


Welcome To The Ultimate Hotel!

by Angel_Ashido



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing, Super Dangan Ronpa 2
Genre: Also Looking For a Better Title!, Alternate Universe - Hotel, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Ultimate Talents (Dangan Ronpa), Chaos, Drama, Eventual Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi, Eventual Romance, F/F, F/M, Humor, Looking for Beta reader!, M/M, Not Beta Read, The Tea Will Be Piping Tho
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-05 04:41:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25408597
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Angel_Ashido/pseuds/Angel_Ashido
Summary: On Jabberwock Island, the tropical island paradise, resides the Ultimate Hotel. This lively all-inclusive resort is home to some of the biggest personalities on the island; there's never a dull moment in this stunning three-star location. Shuichi is the assistant manager of this hotel, with Kaede at the helm. There will be chaos, hilarity, drama and bubbling romance under the sun.
Relationships: Chabashira Tenko/Yumeno Himiko, Oma Kokichi & Saihara Shuichi, Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi
Kudos: 22





	Welcome To The Ultimate Hotel!

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to this bizarre adventure that is my brain after binging 'Benidorm'! Come along on this wild ride as we see the beloved cast of Danganronpa V3 running a hotel. 
> 
> Currently, this work has not been beta read, but I am very eager to find someone who can do the job! I'm not looking for someone with experience, just someone who can read this and enjoy it.
> 
> With that being said, buckle up and enjoy the ride...

When Shuichi Saihara’s blaring alarm clock forced him to wake up, the first thing he saw was sunlight. The rays cut elegantly through his half-closed blinds, highlighting serenely floating dust specks. He forced himself into an upright position, grabbing the clock and silencing the irritating beeping. When his bare feet hit the tiled floor he braced himself for a jolt of coldness - a chilly floor just seemed normal. However, the floor was as warm as ever. 

_ Another sweltering day, huh? _

Shuichi stood and went about getting ready for the day. This blistering heat was forecast for the rest of the week, and he was already sweating. The boy tried to calculate how much time it would take to shower, versus when he had to be down at the reception. After deciding that he was too hot to think, he entered his small bathroom, turned the dial on the shower and stepped into the icy waterfall. 

_ Still freezing… I really need to get Miu to fix that. _

The Ultimate Hotel was situated on the tropical paradise, Jabberwock Island. In the grand scheme of things, the building was fairly new. Becoming the assistant manager of a hotel wasn’t something Shuichi had been expecting. In fact, if you had told him that this is where he’d wind up a few years ago, he’d have looked down and mumbled about how crazy that sounded. Being in a position of authority really wasn’t his style, but after being pushed into it by his good friend Kaede, he quickly realised just how much he enjoyed the job. No day was the same, and there were always problems to be solved. Shuchi took some comfort in that - being idle is something the boy couldn’t tolerate. 

After a quick wash, Shuichi turned the shower off and stepped out to dry himself. Once he had towelled himself down with a cheaply thin beach towel that had ‘Life is a Beach!’ printed on it, he went back to his bedroom and pulled out one of his uniforms. The pale blue polo shirt had no special decoration, but it certainly made the staff stand out from the crowd. He quickly combed his hair and looked in the mirror. Something was definitely missing this picture - something rather essential to the equation. 

_ Where did I put my name tag..? I thought I had left it on the dresser but seems to have disappeared.  _

Opening drawers, peering under the bed and peeping in the fridge seemed to be a lost cause. His metal name tag was nowhere to be found in his apartment. Standing up off of the floor, Shuichi brushed the dust from his knees and nervously checked the time. 6:40 a.m. It was almost time for him to start the day. 

_ Maybe Kaede’s seen it. I probably just left it in the office…  _

Shuichi sighed and made sure to take his key-card. His room was pretty standard - the Ultimate Hotel consisted of apartment-style rooms, some nicer than others. Shuichi was placed in a one-bedroom suite with some of the most basic furniture he had seen in his life. Of course, in his time living there, the apartment had gained quite a few books, alongside an array of weird and wonderful knick-knacks. His personal favourite was a poorly painted poodle ornament. This poodle, affectionately referred to as ‘Frenchie’, had come from a souvenir shop. Kaede had bought it for Shuichi to celebrate him becoming the assistant manager, a position he wasn’t very qualified for, but Kaede seemed to believe in him enough. When presented with Frenchie, Shuichi was rather confused by the strangely mutated canine creature. Kaede just chuckled and said “I swear, the shop lighting made him seem way cuter…” Now, Shuichi found his unfortunate face rather cute - truly, it was a face only a mother could love.

He quickly left the room after straightening a slightly misplaced chair. It was very early by normal standards, but on the staff floor, he could hear his many colleagues getting ready. The walls were… concerningly thin at the Ultimate Hotel. These thin walls had betrayed many noises and conversations that Shuichi desperately wished he could unhear. 

Walking past Miu’s room, Shuichi could hear random strings of profanity. He stopped for a moment, wondering if now would be a good time to ask about his shower. After hearing a rather loud; “I swear to God, if this doesn’t work, I’m seriously gonna murder someone!” Shuichi decided that it was, definitely, not a good time. After hearing the girl add “And I’ll make it look like an accident!”, he was certain that it wasn’t a good time. From Angie’s room, a subtle chanting song could be heard, likely her morning prayers. And, perhaps the rowdiest of the bunch, was Himiko’s room. Tenko’s loud pestering was sailing through the walls as clear as the sunny Jabberwock day. This was likely Tenko’s attempt to wake Himiko up. However, Himiko was clearly having none of it, yelling hexes and spells to try and get rid of the other girl. Shuichi might have intervened, but he really didn’t want to get into that mess… besides, he knew that neither girl was any real threat to the other.

Shuichi reached the elevator and pressed the metal button. After quite a long period of waiting, the doors finally opened. Unfortunately, it wasn’t empty. Kokichi Oma was leaning against the mirrored walls. Shuichi caught him looking distracted for a brief moment, but his expression quickly turned into that of mischief upon seeing him. 

“My, my! If it's not my favourite assistant manager. Good morning, Shuichi!” He chirped, grinning. 

Shuichi stepped into the elevator and sighed. “Good morning. You’re up early…” 

The smaller male tugged at his blue shirt, his metal name badge catching on the fluorescent lighting. “I’m always ready for a day of good work. Especially for you. This place was really going down to the dogs before you came into power. But with you and Kaede at the helm, this place gets better every day!”

“Thanks for the praise…” Shuchi responded sardonically. It was clear to everyone; this place was in serious need of a fresh coat of paint. Kaede and Shuichi were planning to improve it, but a chronically 3-star-hotel is difficult to rescue. 

Kokichi chuckled at Shuchi’s clear sarcasm. “Ouch, even you don’t believe in this place. I’m totally snitching to the hotel inspector! I’ll tell her all about how much you hate this place, and how you’re always sneaking your boyfriends into the buffet!”

“What?! I-I don’t even have a boyfriend!” Kokichi had managed to catch Shuichi off guard with that one. Even after all this time, Shuchi was still trying to figure this guy out. It was somewhat irritating, but it kept him busy all the same - and at least he was rather entertaining. 

Kokichi smirked; “I know. ‘Cuz I know everything! I know that when I leave you'll be blushing too!”

"What do yo-"

"Geez, why are you so cute? It should be a crime..." The way Kokichi lowered his voice, the way his stare could reach Shuichi's very soul... it seemed to strike an icy arrow straight through his heart. 

As if on cue, the elevator door opened and Kokichi skipped out, waving at Shuichi. He didn’t even have time to wonder why Kokichi had exited on the second floor. He was far too distracted with trying to fight off the spreading plague of dusty red afflicting his face. The sight of himself flustered in the elevator’s slightly grimy mirror only made it worse - he felt vague pulsing drumming through his ears, and he wondered if he was having a panic attack. He quickly debunked that, due to the lack of that almost electric anxiety, which had often become a comfort to him. This was definitely  _ not  _ a panic attack… 

_ It’s just the heat… Just the heat, just the heat, just the heat, just the- _

“Oh, hey Shuichi! I was just coming to get you, you sure took your time.” 

He hadn’t even heard the door opening. How was that even possible..? Shuichi was an alert person, and the doors weren’t exactly stealthy when they screeched apart. He hadn’t even noticed Kaede on the other side… and he was looking in the mirror, he definitely should have noticed that. The heat sure can do some crazy things… maybe all he needed was a cold drink.

Quickly composing himself, he exited the elevator and smiled at Kaede. “Sorry, I was just looking for my name tag… have you seen it?” It was a struggle to keep his voice steady, but he managed to pull it off. 

Kaede just smiled and said “Oh yeah, it’s in my desk. Gonta found it in the storage room. I’m not sure how you managed to lose it there, though…” 

Shuichi was confused for a moment before he figured out exactly when it had happened. 

  
  
_ Oh… I had almost forgotten…  _

Yesterday evening, Shuichi was helping Kaito carry boxes of vodka to the bar. On their second trip, they heard a peculiar noise. They went to the back of the storeroom and found something truly horrifying… just recalling the incident made Shuichi shudder. Witnessing such an atrocity, Kaito let out what he insisted was a ‘manly scream’ and bumped into a shelf. He managed to catch it rather quickly, but a single bottle of soda fell from the tall shelving unit and exploded all over Shuichi. After fumbling around to get clean, Kaito dragged Shuichi out of the storeroom and implored him to never speak of it again.

Given that Shuichi was covered in soda and traumatised, he quickly took off the shirt and changed it out for a fresh one - the storeroom was full of them. While he was changing, he must have left the name-tag on the shelf or something… he was certainly in a rush. 

_ That explains why the name-tag was nowhere to be found… what I saw was… downright awful… I really wish Himiko did have magic - then she could erase the terrible memories…  _

“You… really don’t want to know.” Shuichi finally answered, his face grim. 

Kaede was clearly taken aback by Shuichi’s seriousness. “Wait… what? What happened?” 

“Nothing! Nothing happened!” Shuichi rushed into the office, desperate to avoid the conversation.

When he entered the familiar space, he was greeted with someone… even more familiar. 

“Ah, good morning…” Tsumugi Shirogane sheepishly greeted. From what Shuichi could tell, she had been rifling through the cupboard - probably for some sort of itinerary, or perhaps a long-forgotten item. As the event planner, Tsumugi was frequently down in the office. 

“...” 

Shuichi just stood, feet planted to the ground, gaze averted. His face instantly turned beetroot. Any hope that his previously flushed face had chilled out was as dead as his innocence. 

“You, um… don’t look so good, Shuichi.” Her high voice called out. 

Kaede entered behind him. “Is everything all right? You’ve been acting really weird…” 

“Oh, Kaede. It’s probably because of last night.” Tsumugi said, crossing her arms self-consciously. “If it makes you feel any better, Shuichi, I gave your shirt to Kirumi. I know you left in a hurry, but it was all wet and sticky. She said she could get the stains out no bother though!” 

Kaede seemed to choke on nothing at that. “I’m sorry, what?!”

“It’s all good though because I cleaned up the storeroom too! There was a little bit of a mess, especially from where Kaito exploded the… y’know, the thing.” She continued, seemingly unaware of how bad it sounded. 

“Tsumugi… you’re making this whole thing sound really bad-”

“And don’t worry about the costume!”

“Tsumugi…” 

“And I didn’t even need to-”

“Tsumugi!” Shuichi shouted.

“Oh… sorry, I think I… I just made it worse, didn’t I…” 

Kaede pushed past Shuichi and stood between the two. 

“Alright, I want to know what’s going on here! I won’t judge you, I just need to know what you did in my storeroom… I’ll try not to be mad…” Kaede was using her manager voice… this had Shuichi cursing this entire situation. 

Tsumugi tried to explain. “Well you see, Shuichi and Kaito… and, and the vodka… and the fursuit-”

“THE WHAT NOW?!” 

“Tsumugi, shut up! Don’t go involving us!” Shuichi turned to Kaede. “Kaito and I were moving crates of vodka for the bar. We went into the storeroom and heard a weird noise. Because we work here, we figured we should check it out. Then we saw…” Shuichi looked over to Tsumugi in mild disgust. 

“What did you see?” Kaede demanded - she was getting rather serious. 

“TsumugiwasinafursuitbentoverinfrontofacamerareadingouttheBibleanddoingaweirddance…”

“Huh? I didn’t catch that…” Kaede was taken aback by how quickly Shuichi forced the words out. 

“Tsumugi was in a fursuit… bent over in front of a camera… reading out the Bible… and doing a weird dance…”

“AGAIN?!” 

“Wait… what?! This has happened before?!” Shuichi cried out, shocked at the manager’s response. 

“Tsumugi, I told you to do weird stuff in your own time! Last time you were hiding behind the pool bar dressed up as a scantily clad, hula hooping, Power Ranger, and now this?! I mean, how can you even wear a fursuit in this heat?!”   
  
Tsumugi lifted her head. “It gets awfully hot and sweaty… but that’s not all that uncommon in a-”

“Nope! I’m just… nope! There’s only so much of this I can take!” Kaede cried out before marching behind her desk and flinging herself into her swivel chair. 

“Kaede, I’m so sorry! I was just trying it on because Himiko asked me to make one for her for… personal reasons! I was just going to take a few pictures to show her how my creations look, but… my camera bag had a bible in it from this one cosplay commission, and I just…” She paused, clearly feeling ashamed. “I saw Kaito and Shuichi leave, so I thought I could get some work done quickly! This guy online  _ loves  _ when I dress up in that god-awful thing, read him the Bible, and do Fortnite dances! It… helps him get to sleep, apparently.” 

“I highly doubt he uses those videos to ‘sleep’...” Shuichi muttered, running an exasperated hand through his hair. 

“I don’t care what he uses them for… All I care about is getting that, erm… how does Miu put it… ‘dummy thicc pay-check’. I need the money! Getting plane tickets to cons is pricey!” Tsumugi was clearly trying to defend herself. “I swear to you guys… I’m not a furry! Please, please don’t fire me… I like this job a lot! I’ll do overtime!” 

Kaede sighed. “Just promise me that it will never happen again…” 

Tsumugi brightened up. “Yes! I promise - I swear on my Blue-Eyes White Dragon!” 

Shuichi wondered what her room looked like… she had all sorts of cosplay stuff, and apparently an entire fursuit just laying around. It must be a paradise for extreme geeks - or a regular person’s nightmare… 

“Apologise to Shuichi and Kaito, and I’ll let you off on a warning,” Kaede said with an air of finality. 

The offender just nodded enthusiastically. “I’m so sorry Shuichi! I’m just plain embarrassed, and I hope you can find it your heart to forgive me!” 

“Y-Yeah, sure… just… never again, Tsumugi…” 

“You have my word! My healing word…” 

Kaede slumped back in her chair. “Anyway… there’s bingo today, right? You should probably set that up.” 

“Right away, boss! I’ll do my best today - and I’ll keep an eye out for Kaito!”

The blue-haired girl left, headed for the indoor bar area to prepare for the bingo. When the elevator doors screeched to a close, Kaede burst out laughing. Her loud, joyous cackle pierced through the tension, bringing about a freshness to the office. Shuichi couldn’t help but fall into a fit of laughter alongside her - Kaede’s hilarity dragging him down the rabbit-hole of cackling. 

“Th-That… was the best thing all week! That was soooo crazy!” She forced out, tears starting to bubble in her eyes. 

“Poor Kaito… his face when she approaches him-”

“Shuichi! Come see!” Kaede urged, suddenly looking to the cameras, wiping away the tears. 

Shuichi approached her and leaned on the back of her chair, watching the security cameras. It was reception… Kaito was at the desk, and Tsumugi was talking to him. Kaito wore an expression of sheer horror, his eyes seemed to be firmly fixed on the ground - though, it was difficult to tell from the grainy footage. 

The pair cackled as they watched the silent apology, watching the awkwardness radiate from the pair, seeing Kaito laugh nervously, witnessing Tsumugi’s rapid gestures as she tried to explain the situation… it was all too much. Once the apology had ended, and Tsumugi went back to bingo planning, Shuichi was left smiling at the whole situation. Just a few minutes before, it was a horrifically horrible and anxious scenario - he felt so awful about the whole thing. But now… he was laughing like it was the funniest thing in the world. 

“I love this job,” Kaede stated, smiling down at her keyboard as her computer started up. 

“No two days are the same…” Shuichi said, approaching his own desk to log-in. 

“That’s for sure.” She agreed. “But, y’know, it’s the people I like. I love how close we are with the staff… I know it sounds cliche, but it’s like we’re really just a big happy family!” 

“I don’t know about the ‘happy’ part, but it really does feel like a family, you’re right.”

“A family is bound to hit its rough spots, but it just makes them stronger! We can’t be happy all the time, but I hope we’ll all be friends for life… I’d put up with the good, the bad, and the ugly for that.” 

“Me too…” And, Shuichi did hope that. Sure, there were some really tough times. But the idea of living a life without Tenko’s enthusiasm, Kaede’s encouragement, Tsumugi’s strangeness, Kaito’s unwavering loyalty, Maki’s softly silent scorn, Himiko’s delusions, Angie’s eccentrics, Gonta’s good manners, Korekiyo’s… erm, knowledge, Rantaro’s laid back attitude, Ryoma’s words of seasoned wisdom, Kirumi’s devotion, Miu’s peculiar sense of humour, and, of course, Kokichi’s antics… a life without these people would be unbearably dull, Shuichi thought. 

When the team was together, Shuichi found himself feeling less useless - he felt like he was a part of something special. Something… bigger than any single person could ever be. Kaede had hit the nail on the head - it was a family.

Shuichi’s computer finally powered up - surely they were due an upgrade… 

The assistant manager was torn from his thoughts as the door to the office burst open violently. 

“I NEED A RAISE!” Miu bellowed, storming in. 

Kaede looked up, confused and startled. “Miu? What’s wrong?”

“That big burly guy? The one in room 244? He CLOGGED the toilet so bad that the bowl CRACKED! I can’t put up with this any longer… I need a damn raise to be dealing with this crap!” She explained, very clearly irritated. 

“Ah, do you mean that in the literal sense?” Shuichi dared to ask. 

“SHUT UP, ya beta pleb!” 

He quickly shut up. 

“Miu… go upstairs, talk to Korekiyo, and ask him to call the plumber. Tell Mr. Nidai that he will be billed the damages.” Kaede told her. “This isn’t the first time this has happened… we’ve already moved that guest three times…” 

“Ugh, you had better be thankful that I, the gorgeous girl genius, am as benevolent as I am stacked!” The angered maintenance girl slapped her chest for impact and whipped around to leave, before Kaede stopped her.

“Oh, Miu, could you make time to fix the office door please?”

Shuichi turned to Kaede, confused. “Fix the office door? But there’s nothing wrong with-” 

It quickly became apparent what was wrong with it. When Miu had burst in, she had kicked it off the hinges… 

Miu turned to look at it. “Eh, just a scratch. You’ll live!”

“Miu!” 

“Eeh! Yes, yes, r-right away, ma’am…” 

Once again, she tried to leave. But this time, it was Shuichi who stopped her. 

“When you’re free, can you take a look at my shower? The hot water isn’t working…” 

“Yeah, yeah, whatever… Have fun making out, or whatever it is that you nasty virgins do in here…” With that, she finally left. 

Kaede called after her; “Love you too boo!” This comment earned her an undistinguishable mumble of discontent. Kaede turned to Shuichi. “What time are we at?”

“It’s currently…” He checked his watch. “7:21…” 

“It’s going to be a loooong day… Pretty exciting, right?.”

She grinned and got herself settled - Shuichi followed suit. They spent the next hour or so doing their morning paperwork - checking their stats, writing up reports for the higher-ups, reading through customer complaints… 

When the two got ready to do their morning rounds, Kaede stopped dead in her tracks. 

“Wait… didn’t Tsumugi say that she was asked to make a fursuit for..?” She began, a twisted, disturbing look appearing on her face.

“... Himiko…” Shuichi finished, the implications finally dawning on him. 

“I’ll just… p-pretend like I didn’t hear that…” Kaede decided. 

“I wonder if Tenko knows?” Shuichi thought aloud. 

“Oh, she absolutely does! Have you heard the two of them when they-”

“Shut up, shut up, shut up!” Shuichi yelled, trying to stop his friend from tarnishing his view on their friends. 

Kaede just laughed. “Never a dull moment, indeed.” 

“I need a drink…” Shuichi mumbled, leaving the office. 

Kaede followed, putting a hand on his shoulder. “You and me, both...” She closed her eyes and Shuichi thought she looked utterly serene. Like the peaceful surface of a river in- 

“Oh God! I forgot about the new employee!” She suddenly yelled. The loud outburst invoked an involuntary yelp from Shuichi. 

“Calm down! Who is it, and when are they arriving?” Shuichi asked her. He hadn’t been informed of a new member of staff… this struck him as rather odd, given that he was supposed to be involved in the interviewing process. 

Kaede looked to her friend with unspoken words hanging from the tip of her tongue. After a pause, she finally said; “I… don’t actually know who they are. It’s a bit of a… weird situation. Apparently, the CEO sent them?” 

Judging by the way Kaede was speaking, Shuichi got the impression that she was pretty much in the dark on this. “You mean that the company that owns the hotel sent them here? That’s odd… why would they go out of their way to handpick staff? Could they be some sort of mole?” He mused, ushering Kaede into the elevator. 

“Beats me, but we’d better hurry! They’re probably here… I think they were due to come at 8 a.m.?” The manager’s office was located in the hotel’s basement. Reception was on the first floor. Well, ‘Ground Floor’ to guests - the basement was considered to be ‘Floor -1’ - there was also a small lounge, though it was mainly used by the kids club or for minor events. The hotel actually had a large bar area which served as a venue for nighttime entertainment. 

Kaede’s painted nail pressed the button for the Ground Floor. They waited in silence; Kaede silently panicking, and Shuichi thinking about how odd this all seemed. The hotel’s elusive CEO had sent them an employee… perhaps they were a relative? It wasn’t uncommon for higher-ups to throw their unemployed relatives a bone, so to speak. There was the possibility of them being a mole, as Shuichi had mentioned. Perhaps they were there to secretly evaluate the hotel. Or maybe they were just being transferred - the group that owned the Ultimate Hotel had several other businesses. Perhaps they just wanted to move a talented employee to this particular location. 

No matter how he looked at it, though, it was certainly strange. When the elevator came to a stop, and the familiar screeching of metal sounded, the two stepped out and into their reception. 

Shuichi would describe the hotel’s reception as a basic yet luxurious feel. The walls were painted white, though they could really use a touch-up, he noted. Complimenting the white walls was a black tiled floor, glossy, with tiny flecks of iridescent glitter within it. Various short tables were spread throughout the reception, accompanied by comfortable plush purple chairs. Tall green plants spread their wide leaves as though they were welcoming the guests; these plants were a nightmare to tend to, but they at least they looked nice enough. A large fish tank held a variety of tropical fish to the left of the long, polished, reception desk. Paintings were hung along the walls - though, Shuichi had always found them rather odd. The images reminded him of the Rorschach inkblot test. Black and white swirls depicted vague shapes that might have been masks, or bears, or cackling children, or a marriage proposal, or a night out with friends- 

He often had to force his eyes away from the pictures on the walls. 

A bit concerning, really. 

But… not nearly as concerning as what they had walked into. 

“Hey, come back! I wanna stick a fork in you!” An all too familiar voice was echoing around the reception. 

“Absolutely not! That is a violation of personal boundaries!” 

The first thing Shuichi’s eyes were drawn to was the familiar; Kokichi Oma running around the room like a gleeful child. After that, he noticed the striking unfamiliar. 

“What the hell is-”

“Oh! Shuichi! Guess what I found~” Kokichi directed his attention to the hotel’s assistant manager. 

Kaede’s eyes watched Kokichi’s every movement; the bounce in his step making her visibly frustrated.

“Excuse me!” Called out a somewhat synthetic voice. “Are you the manager? I would like to submit a formal complaint!”

Kokichi let out a carefree laugh upon hearing the distressed robot voice his concerns. “Pfft, what a Karen! Everyone knows that a bucket of bolts doesn’t have the right to complain.”

“Shut up, Kokichi. Can you  _ please  _ go and do your job?” Kaede pushed aside him and approached the robotic boy. “Are you our new employee by any chance..?” 

“As a matter of fact, I am. I hope you know that HR will be receiving a very strongly worded letter about this.” Kaede’s ability to keep calm in such a situation was baffling to Shuichi. Here she was, having a conversation with what appeared to be a bonafide robot, and she was able to just roll with it. Meanwhile, Shuichi was just standing there; slack-jawed and shocked. 

“I’m very sorry about this… please, just ignore Kokichi. I have no idea how we’ve yet to fire him.” The last part was pointed at Kokichi like an assassin’s blade. He just shrugged in response, wearing that infuriating smirk. 

“I am K1-B0. But you may refer to me as Keebo. As you may have noticed, I am a robot - one of the most impressive accomplishments in the field of robotics, in fact. Professor Idabashi created and raised me. I have been placed here so that I can observe and interact with humans through the means of customer service. With that being said, I hope we can get along from this moment forward.”

Shuichi was yet to come up with anything competent to say. He was just absorbing this information and was trying to process it as it came. 

As always, Kokichi was the first one to talk. “Wow, that sure was a lot of exposition. It’s pretty cool to have a real-life robot on the team, though! I can’t wait to work with you we’ll be the best of friends, I’m sure of it!”

  
  


“I highly doubt that…” Keebo said, rolling his eyes. 

_ Does he even need those, or are they purely cosmetic..? Every movement is just so… _

_ Strange. _

Kokichi continued nonetheless.“Hey, hey, hey! Do robots have-”

“ _ Don’t you dare-”  _ Kaede tried to stop him, obviously fearing what he was going to say. 

“Self-esteem issues?”

That was… not where Shuichi thought that was going. 

“No, of course not…” Keebo answered though Shuichi wasn’t very convinced. 

“Kokichi, get out before I call Tenko.” Tenko was head of security, and she was notoriously hard on men. Kokichi must have been adequately scared off because he just muttered ‘sure thing boss’ and scurried off. “Now then. Keebo, if you come downstairs we can get everything ready for you. Your name badge, key card, we’ll have to put you on the system… after that, Shuichi can show you around the hotel. You can meet our other staff members too - they’re a lot less… chaotic.”

Keebo smiled and straightened up. “Thank you very much Miss..?”

“Akamatsu. But you can just call me Kaede - everyone else does. And the quiet one is Shuichi Saihara, the assistant manager.”

“Ah, it’s nice to meet you…” He shook hands with the robot, pleasantly surprised at the warmth of his metal palm. 

“Likewise.”

And so, Kaede took Keebo downstairs, leaving Shuichi in the reception. She said she’d ring him when it’s time to give him a tour. Shuichi wasn’t really supposed to drink on the job, and the bar wasn’t open yet, but… 

_ It’s been one hectic morning… perhaps I should indulge in a very small, large, gin and tonic. _

He shook his head. 

_ No… I feel like this is a day I should be fully sober for.  _

With that, he left the reception. 

Leaving the air-conditioned room behind, he stepped out into the light. 

_ Alright, Ultimate Hotel. Let’s see what’s in store today! _

  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading this rather lengthy first chapter! I'd like to encourage you to comment, leave a kudos or do a Fortnite dance in a fursuit... whatever's convenient for you. 
> 
> Again, if anyone's interested in beta reading, hmu!


End file.
